6.5 Months & Flexing My Schedule!

Our "little" B is 6 1/2 months old!  She's no longer all that little (50th percentile for height and weight at her six-month appointment), she's moving like crazy (so far rolling all over the place and scooting backwards), she is desperate to crawl forward, and loves trying new foods.  Her first swimming lesson was last night and she loved it.  We only dunked her head under the water once and was surprised by it, but not upset.  She also loves drinking from a small cup she has with a straw.  She's obsessed with straws.  I blame the fact that she sees me and her nanny drinking Starbucks from a straw and is jealous!  She brings us so much joy.

I finally worked up the courage to talk to my boss about flexing my schedule at work.  Since I don't really want to reduce my hours, just work in the evening after B goes to sleep and sometimes go home early or arrive late, I just asked if I could occasionally do that - leave at 3, hang out with B and then work for a few hours after 7:30 PM when she is asleep.  Before I even finished my sentence , he said it was fine. All of that stress and anxiety about this on my part and the conversation could not have gone better.  Last Friday I worked from home for the first time and it was awesome.  I worked the night before to clear my plate and took 2 calls while B was napping, but I also went to music class with her, went for a run with her in the stroller, and spent a lot of time just playing.  Thanks to all of you who shared your thoughts on this with me and gave me the courage to ask.

That's really the update from here. Life is so, so good.

I think of Quinn often.  I also think often about having another baby (yes, so soon).  I don't know if I have the appetite for IVF, doctors, etc. after finally being healthy again after such a long time.  But then I look at Blythe and I know we'd love to have another. Who knows.

One Month & Pregnancy and Parenting Pressures

Baby B is one month old today!  It's hard to believe but I can tell she is growing and changing all the time and I am starting to pick up on what her different cries mean, how to soothe her, etc. (ha - even as I write this I know she is plotting some way to confuse me this afternoon).  I still marvel at her existence on a daily basis.  Her eyelashes.  Her soft skin.  Her skinny legs and tiny feet.  Her long fingers.  Her blue eyes.  Anyway...

The frog legs.  The hair.  Love her so much.

First, I've been listening to "The Longest Shortest Time" podcast and am hooked.  Do any of you listen?  If not, give it a try if podcasts are your thing.  It is all about the early months of parenting and I'm loving the topics and interviews.

In our walks around the neighborhood and late-night feeding sessions, I've had a lot of time to think about pregnancy, birth, being a Mom to a living baby (wow, never thought I'd write that), and just how life is so different.  Yesterday I had a conversation with one of my best friends who is also a pediatrician at a hospital.  We were discussing two things I have found to be totally crazy about giving birth and having a baby: c-sections and breastfeeding.

I had a c-section.  You can read my delivery story here if you'd like, but mine was medically necessary to save Baby B who was having decelerations.  It was terrifying (the decelerations) and I could not have cared less about how she came out of me, as long as she was alive.  That said, I didn't care ahead of the birth, either, except for the fact that I was on massive quantities of blood thinners, so a c-section was riskier for me than it normally us.

What I'm trying to get around to saying is that I have been astonished by the number of people who have expressed disappointment on my behalf because I had a c-section.  She is here safe and sound! Sure, would I have liked to avoid major abdominal surgery?  Of course!  But am I upset because I didn't get to have a vaginal delivery?  No, not at all. I don't feel like I had a worse experience or that I failed in some way.  My baby is alive.  I'm fine.  Mission accomplished.  I've just been really struck by this cultural bias towards vaginal birth and the desire to do so at all costs and then feeling disappointment or guilt after the fact if you end up with a c-section.  Obviously everyone is entitled to feel how they do personally, but do you really need to project your opinion onto other people!

And breastfeeding!  It is going well for us and I am extremely grateful for this fact.  It is so nice to be able to easily soothe her when she is hungry and to feed her on demand.  Perhaps I'd have a different perspective on this subject if it weren't going well for us, but I was astonished by the pressure in the hospital to breastfeed, the number of visits we had from the lactation consultants, and the realization that if B weren't latching, eating enough, etc., I would have been made to feel terrible about it.  I get that there are benefits to breastfeeding, but the pressure and the judgment is just so extreme these days.  Isn't the most important thing a happy, healthy, well-fed baby? If that requires formula, so be it!  I just listened to a great podcast on this subject if you want to hear more.

Just my thoughts on two early motherhood observations.  It would be easier if we could all just be nice to each other.  Everyone is doing their best!